at this point, i will be so happy when this debaucherous weekend is over... i just can't do it anymore. i have eaten and eaten and drank and drank. i feel like i look like a late- period orson welles and have achieved a girth somewhere close to that of the state of missouri. there is a non- profit called heifer international that my wife is currently reading about aloud, sitting across from me at the table, and i'm thinking seriously of changing my name to heifer interntional as well.
anyway, i hope that you have all been well. this morning finds me at my in- law's house [we drove in yesterday morning for a big reunion- type thing] and as such i have little time to share with you*. i'd like to accomplish something here today, however, and so, without further adieu, i present to you a special thanksgiving weekend- hangover installment of l.l's.d.p., specially dedicated today to my in- laws: thank you for letting me crash last night and also for letting me marry your daughter.
1] we are trying to have a baby, by the way.
2] my vegetarian alter- ego.
3] aquarium drunkard and athens.
4] in anticipation of xmas shopping.
5] you gotta have a sense of humor about these things.
i will be back on the horse tomorrow, folks. until then, i'll be thinking of you. and fat.
*i'm going to skip the cliched minutiae of how pejorative i find the word 'blog', by the way, but suffice it to say that i do and that furthermore i'd simply like to refer to my sharing with you here as 'an independent online column'. okay then.